Something Around The Place

High school can tear us apart; hurts us; destroy us even. However, there’s one thing I’ve learned so far, and it wasn’t in Math or English. It was that except for my best friends, I don’t need anything else. Because without them, I would be lost. No matter how many broken hearts or messed up fights; no matter how messed up my family is, what my grades are or how many stupid decisions I make, they were there and that’s what really counts. That is probably the single most important thing I’ve learned and it’s because they changed my life.

I am insanely scared of everything coming to an end. This place is my home. It’s where my people are, have been or will be next year and I can’t stay. I have to move on and it’s killing me. It’s home. How do you leave somewhere so special and not look back? I’m looking back, I’ve remembered so many amazing things about the past five years and it’s fucking killing me to have to say goodbye. I’ve said one too many fucking goodbyes this year. I can’t handle any more. I think I’m just going to go curl up in a ball and continue bawling my eyes out. I haven’t been able to do homework because all I wanted to do was look at photos. Remember everything. I actually haven’t cried so much for about half a year. I’m so frightened. I really am. I’m so scared of feeling worthless again. Having nothing. Having no one. And it’s not that I know I won’t, I know they’ll be there. But, its the fact that. You know what, never mind. The impact these last 5 years has been able to break me, make me, break me and then again now, slowly make me again. Without Glenunga. Fuck. Imagine that. I don’t want to. As much as I dislike the place, I don’t think I’d be 90% of who I am without it.

I love all my friends so much, and I hope they know that.

Over and out.